Minecraft Maniacs
by Elvira Rayne
Summary: In which the Black Order and other characters play minecraft and enjoy themselves by burning down houses, destroying the environment, getting blown up by Creepers, and falling into a large pit of lava. No real plot to this story...Crack fic. Rated T for SobaSamurai's potty mouth. Ideas and OC's are welcome :)


**Don't ask me where I'm going with this because I honestly don't know. This is more of a crack fic and I'll probably add in some mysterious people later on (might even add in some reviewers, eh?) There probably won't be any pairings either so...enjoy? I don't own D. Gray-man!**

OneEyedRabbit joined the game.

InnocentPokerMaster joined the game.

Bookman joined the game.

SobaSamurai joined the game.

"Whoa! This game is so...so..."

"Pixelated." Allen finished Lavi's excitement.

"Che, how do you play this game?!" Kanda struggled with the Xbox controller.

"Take it easy, Yu!~ Didn't you read the manual?"

"There's a manual for this game?" Allen questioned, causing Lavi to face palm.

"Of course, there's a manual for everything." Bookman answered.

"You're so boring, ya old panda! Couldn't you choose a more cool name?"

"Says the one-eyed rabbit?" Lenalee was passing by, watching them as they ran around, clueless as to what they were trying to accomplish from playing this certain game.

"Hello, I have one eye! Plus Samurai over here keeps calling me Usagi...which means rabbit."

"Or bunny!" Allen added. Sweat drop.

"Yes, Allen, or bunny. But rabbit sounds much better." Lavi inquired as he started destroying a tree.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING LAVI?! YOU'RE DESTROYING THE ENVIRONMENT!"

"Shut up, Baka Moyashi!" Kanda growled, trying to figure out how Lavi did that.

"Allen, you have to get wood to build things! We're on survival mode! We must survive!"

"Ooooh, so how did you do that? Oh I got it!"

Bookman was already done with half of his wooden fort when Allen had starting mining the wood. He _mutilated _the entire forest and Kanda was really starting to get pissed. ("WHERE ARE ALL THE TREES AT?!") Allen would giggled silently and evilly. Lavi had already created his crafting table and a wooden pickaxe. Only Lavi and Bookman had read all the instructions on how to play while Allen and Kanda just ran around aimlessly, or in Allen's case, stole all the trees mercilessly.

"Oh look! It's a cow! Can I pet the cow?"

"No, Allen, you cannot pet the cow. You can kill it though!" Lavi ran in front of Allen and swung his pickaxe at the cow and it mooed in pain. It turned red and started to run around in circles as Lavi murdered it. Allen looked absolutely horrified.

"Why did you kill it?!"

"To get steak, duh." Lavi replied and walked towards a large mountain. Allen didn't have anything else to do so he followed Lavi.

"What are you doing?" Allen asked. Bookman was now finishing the last touches on his wooden fort.

"I'm going to mine for coal, so we can build torches."

"What do we need torches for?"

"To light up the cave so we can mine diamonds."

"What do we need diamonds for?"

"Diamonds are awesome! And we'll make diamond swords!"

"Oh that's cool!"

"Yes, now take this pickaxe young warrior and help me mine this coal!" Lavi threw a pickaxe at Allen.

Kanda finally figured out how to mine dirt and started mining downwards...straight downwards. Allen and Lavi started mining the mountain, and Bookman started to build his own farm. The whole place was silent as they all mined away. Kanda really didn't understand what the point of the game was and just kept digging dirt.

"What's this tan stuff?"

"That's iron!"

"Oh! So can I mine it?"

"No, you need a stone pickaxe."

"How do I get one?"

"Make it out of sticks and cobblestone, you know the gray blocks."

"Oh! How do I do that?" Lavi sighed, this explaining was quite tiresome, especially for someone who asked a lot of questioned. Aka, Allen.

"Go find my crafting table."

"Okay!" Allen ran off into the wilderness of the cavern they found.

"Yu, that's not a very good idea..."

"Why no—AWE WHAT THE FUCK?!" Kanda exclaimed as his character fell unexpectedly into a pit of lava. Lavi snickered and had to stop Kanda from murdering the defenseless TV.

"Now, now, Yu, behave."

"DON'T CALL ME THAT! THIS GAME IS STUPID!" Kanda stormed off.

SobaSamurai exited the game.

PrincessInBoots joined the game.

"Woot, Lenalee!"

"Okay, lets see here...where did all the wood go?"

"Ask Allen if you need wood."

The background in the game slowly started to get dark. Lenalee quickly ran to a village and hid in one of the houses while Allen was still stuck in the cave, trying to find his way out. Lavi just stuck with his wooden pickaxe and mined the hell out of the coal in said cave Allen was lost in.

"I can't see, Lavi!"

"That's why I said we need torches!"

"Where can I get a torch?!"

"Just...stay there, Allen..."

"Oh...okay..." Allen waited patiently as Lavi wandered around the cave, looking for any sight of Allen. He placed torches down randomly and pulled out his map occasionally. There was a small sizzling sound heard and Allen turned his character around and screamed when the green monster blew up in his face...and he died. "What was that?!" Lavi was too busy laughing to answer.

"That was a Creeper, Allen."

"He was creepy! Why did he frown at me and why did he blow up?!"

"No, I meant it's called a Creeper. They blow up whenever they get close to you. If you're in water and they blow up though, you'll be safe."

"There's water in this game?!"

"Yes, you can drown Allen."

"This game is scary..."

"Yup, someone could so make a parody of 1000 ways to die on minecraft...I wonder if anyone's done that yet."

"I don't want to play anymore, this game is scary-"

"AHA! I found your dead body Allen...wow...that's a lot of wood..." Lavi collected Allen's belongings and ran off.

"You thief! That was my wood! Agh, its too easy to steal other people's stuff on this game!"

"You always drop your stuff when you die, Allen. You should have made a chest and stored all your stuff in it."

"What? Why is this game so complicated. Agh, I'm hungry. I'm going to go eat."

InnocentPokerMaster exited the game.

Lavi laughed.

"Hahaha, Allen eats when he's frustrated, that's great." Lavi had now made his own house inside the cave and with his photographic memory, he was able to get out...alive. By the time he exited his house, the sun was beginning to come up. Allen would remember to ask Lenalee for a private session with her so that she could teach him how to play. Lavi sneaked across Bookman's yard with Flint and Steel in his hand. Lenalee giggled and joined him. "Look, Lenalee! It's a wild panda!" Lavi whispered. Bookman appeared in front of them and they both yelled.

"AH!"

"What are you Slenderman now?!"

"What are you doing at my house, idiot?"

"Did you not hear me before? I was looking for a wild panda and look! I found one!" Bookman was not amused and went back to tending his garden of wheat. Lavi sneaked behind the house and lit it on fire with Flint and Steel. Then him and Lenalee booked it for the hills and laughed manically as Bookman tried to put the fire out.

"This means war."

KomurinKreator joined the game.

**Hm, I wonder who that could be? XD So what do you think of the first chapter? Yeah it was a bit uneventful...except for Kanda getting mad about falling into lava XD I once made a rainbow wool house and someone set it on fire...and that's when the TNT came into the whole buzz. Review for maybe some new ideas? Thanks for reading! :)**


End file.
